'Kindness cost him his life': Woman guilty of hotel room murder

Like so many men James was embarrassed by the control and violence being inflicted on him. Sadly, he would never come forward to seek help.

– Ashe, James’ mother

A woman from London has been convicted of murdering a man in a Clacton hotel room.

Polly Murphy, of Hornsey Lane Gardens in Highgate, London, assaulted her partner 47-year-old James Self, also from London, in a hotel room in Hartley Brook Road in Clacton on 8 November 2023.

James Self sustained several injuries and sadly passed away in hospital on 21 December 2023.

Murphy was initially charged with causing grievous bodily harm with intent, but following James’ death was charged with murder.

She has remained remanded in custody since then, and throughout her trial at Chelmsford Crown Court which began in November 2025.

After four weeks of prosecution and defence evidence, cross-examination and deliberation by the jury, Murphy was found guilty of James’ murder and will now be sentenced at the same court on Wednesday 4 February.

Detective Constable Anthony Kopf of the Essex and Kent Serious Crime Directorate, who was the officer in this case, said:

All our work for more than two years has been to secure justice for James.
His family, who have conducted themselves with dignity in the face of the most challenging evidence, saw medical experts explain the extent of the injuries he sustained.
Some of those injuries dated back to further assaults from Murphy – James had been enduring a sustained campaign of abuse at her hands.
Text messages exchanged in the days and weeks leading up to Murphy’s attack in Clacton showed her increasingly volatile treatment of James, which ultimately and tragically culminated in that fatal assault.
There were delays in the proceedings due to multiple changes in legal representation during the case.
These changes did not affect the integrity of the investigation or the strength of the evidence presented by our team, nor the work of prosecutors Barnaby Shaw and Samantha Wright, supported by the Crown Prosecution Service.
Murphy now faces a life sentence for her crimes.
This case serves as a reminder that domestic abuse can affect anyone, including men. No one should feel ashamed to seek help. Essex Police are here to assist, support, and guide anyone experiencing abuse, regardless of gender.

In a statement, James’ mother Ashe said:

On 21 December 2023 my beloved gentle son was in my arms when the dreaded heart monitor signalled the end of his six-week struggle for life.
This was the beginning of what is now two years of living with the pain and grief of losing someone we shouldn't be living without.
All the dreadful weeks of James's struggle with many difficult and painful procedures he endured without complaint.
Like so many men James was embarrassed by the control and violence being inflicted on him. Sadly, he would never come forward to seek help.
Knowing James as I do so well, I realise he would not have fully understood the violence or how to deal with it. He thought loving her would be enough. James as always believed in the good in people.
The two years since the fatal attack I have learned more about domestic violence and the profound effect it has on the victims. James went from being a sociable, happy person to a sad, uncertain and withdrawn one. His friends noticed the change in him.
I do not know how we as a family have got through these past two years. It has changed all of us. The depth of sadness for not only his death, but the brutality inflicted on a caring and frankly vulnerable man. He had such a lot to live for.
James is in my thoughts every day and will be for the rest of my life. I will never hear his voice again or hear him laugh. Never share in our family events.
His kindness may have cost him his life.
I feel broken in so many ways that I cannot explain but the support we have been given by everyone is deeply appreciated. Our friends, James's friends the family liaison officers, the homicide detectives and the police have all supported us through this unbearable time.

Reflect on your abusive behaviour.

If your actions are causing harm in your relationship, it’s time to take responsibility and make a change.

Confidential help is available.

Visit Essex Compass for behaviour‑change support and guidance.

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